Accepting defeat.

So I’ve been in San Diego for a little over a week now, helping out at the other shop. This trip happened with less than a week notice. I’m supposed to be flying home on Sunday. That’s almost a two week long beach ‘workcation’. Pretty cool, huh? I seriously love my job and the family I work for/with.

I tried to explain this to a friend sometime during the five days I had to prepare for this trip that I like traveling and seeing new places, but I can’t be away from my home base for too long. This baffled him because he’s into going on BIG trips, like traveling for a month or something. I respect people that can do it and enjoy it. It seems like it would be a really cool thing to do, but not for me. No thank you. Unless it’s a trip all the way home to Ohio, a week is pushing it. Even Ohio I can’t do more than like a week and a half before I want to continuously punch myself in the face. I came into this trip up for the challenge of a 12 day getaway. Even while looking up flights, I mentioned to Kathy that I was going to challenge myself when she kept suggesting that I come out for two weeks.

This trip has been a blast! The sunsets, the surf, the food. We went to a drag show last night with some of the other workers from the shop. I got to witness a Green Flash sunset with Kathy while on a busy deck at a her favorite beach bar and got intense goosebumps when the entire bar went nuts. I kind of stood up on ONE wave while surfing (I had a hand still down, but Eric called it a stand). So many good times.

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The cool thing about being homesick is that it doesn’t care how old you are or how much fun you’re having.

So, I’m going to just dive into the deep end right of the vulnerability pool and say that this is hands down the most crippling homesickness I’ve ever experienced. I used to get homesick a lot after moving to Colorado. I still every few months or so will get homesick for Ohio for a little bit. But there’s something about what’s happening emotionally right now is different than anything I’ve felt before. And I think it’s physically starting to show.

The bosses offered to let me change my flight a few hours ago, since my help is no longer really needed here. I started writing this post not fully set on a decision. Despite my stubbornness (especially when it comes to taking care of myself) and me wanting to win this challenge with myself, I think I’m going to cut the trip a couple days short and fly back tomorrow. I’m a bit disappointed in myself, but my best friend just reminded me that “there’s also power in accepting that you’ve had enough.” So, I guess I’ll chalk this one up as a challenge loss, but a solid personal growth type of experience.

Guess I should go change my flight.

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